Tim & Co.: What's Good for the Goose

It was Tuesday afternoon, and the weather was busily trying to imitate a nice day, between the sub-freezing chill we’d had for several days and the rain that was supposed to be arriving for the rest of the week. With that in mind, I’d told the kids to put aside chores and homework for an hour or so and go play. After only a little thought, I’d gone out to join them.

We were outside just enjoying the (relative) warmth, throwing balls, and running like madmen—having a good time. It was my kids and my regular after school guests—Gordy and Dex, Doug Marchant, and his cousin Tristan—with a couple of extra visitors. We’d not been outside long when the four younger Malone boys rode up. Parking their bikes by the garage, they gleefully joined in.

After a while, this old man started tiring out, so turned it over to the younger generation and went back to the forum’s chat room. The room was fairly quiet that day, just three of us I think, but we had a nice chat going about something (the possibility of promoting Steven to a leather paddle?) when suddenly there came a tapping, as of some one gently rapping, rapping at my chamber door. I turned to find raven-haired Riley Malone behind me.

"You busy?" he asked.

I’d expected to be asked where to find the Band-aids or something, but he seemed to want to talk, so I invited him in and motioned him towards the ‘spanking chair’, letting him use it the ordinary way this time. He seemed a little bemused at the idea but climbed into it readily enough, while I excused myself to the others in the chat room.

Turning back, I indicated that he had my attention.

"Did you hear what happened to Tim?"

"No. Is he okay?"

"Yeah—well, he might not think he is."

"Oh?" I replied nonchalantly, smelling a story in the air.

"Yeah," Riley answered with a mischievous little grin.

Have you ever heard that ‘Gladness shared is gladness doubled, but misfortune shared is misfortune halved’? I think that, when it’s a brother’s misfortune, it counts as quadrupled instead. At least if the misfortune is of the right type.

"Yesterday, Mom took Krista so they could get their hair done, and they took the toddlers with them. Dad wasn’t home yet, so Mom told us that she wanted me and Tyler to get all the trash from the house so Dad could take it out this morning. Tim was supposed to fold some laundry and put it away, and she told Donny and Scooter to help him.

"Well, the little kids can’t fold much, but they got all the underwear and stuff and took it where it went, but then they started watching cartoons while Tim did the big stuff. Me and Tyler got all the trash done and went to our room to work on a Clix team for that game Bryce wants to play.

"After a while, we heard Tim yelling. It sounded like he was telling the little guys to put the clothes away, but they didn’t wanna, ‘cuase they were watching something. Then it got quiet, so we figured they’d done it or Tim decided to do it, so we went back to our stuff.

"We were trying to look at those rules you gave us to figure something out when we heard something. Tyler said it sounded like someone was getting a spanking, so we wondered if Dad had gotten home, and Tim had told on Donny and Scooter for not helping him, so we went to look.

"Ty was right and someone was getting a spanking, but it wasn’t Dad doing it. Donny was standing there with his pants and shorts around his ankles, and Tim was sitting on the couch spanking Scooter. He was hitting pretty hard—not as hard as Dad would, I think, but still…. Anyway, Scooter’s butt… I mean bottom was turning really red, and Tim was smacking him on the bu… rear and on the legs, and Scooter was all kicking his legs around and trying to get away and he was crying and yelling some and he was trying to tell Tim he was sorry and he’d help, but Tim went right on going and he gave a bunch of spanks. Not a whole, whole bunch like you do, but he probably spanked like a whole minute or something.



"When Tim let Scooter up, he was jumping all around and trying to rub his butt, and he nearly tripped on his pants. Tyler started getting kinda mad, ‘cause he leaned over to me and said ‘he didn’t even let him get the spanky bear,’ and you could tell he was mad ‘causa that, ‘cause Scooter really likes his spanky bear since you gave it to him.

"Anyway, I was watching Tim when he grabbed Donny’s wrist and tried to pull him over his lap, but Donny didn’t wanna go and he said he was gonna tell Mom, but Tim just said, ‘What’re ya gonna tell her? That you were watchin’ cartoons insteada minding her? She’ll spank you anyway, and I’ll bet she uses the brush.’ Then Donny started crying, ’cause Mama never spanked him with the brush before, and I think Tim was just making that up, but Donny let Tim pull him across his lap. While they were doin that, Tyler went over and hugged Scooter, and Scooter was still crying pretty hard, but he shoved his face against Ty’s belly and they stood there, so Scooter didn’t see Donny getting spanked.

"Tim spanked him just like he had Scooter, and he was hitting his butt real hard and making it real red and Scooter was all jumping around and kicking and he put his hands back behind him. Tim told him to move ‘em but he didn’t, so Tim started smacking him down on the legs, and I know that really hurts, so I went over and got Donny’s hands and held them for him, ‘til Tim finished spanking him.

"He was jumping around too, and it was kinda funny, ‘cause his peter was flopping around, and he was hopping a lot, but I felt bad for him, ‘cause even though it was just Tim spanking, and he didn’t do it as hard as Dad would, you could tell it really burned.

"So anyway, after Tim let Donny up, me and Tyler started going back to our room while he was chewing them out ‘bout Mom telling them to help and how they’re supposed to mind, and I’d just pushed our door shut when I heard Dad yelling ‘What the he… heck’s going on in here?’

"I looked at Ty and he looked at me, and then we kinda eased the door open. Donny and Scooter were still standin’ there with their bottoms all bare and red, and Tim was looking like somebody’d just hit him in the head or sumthin’ and Dad was all yelling at him ‘bout what he thought he was doin’ and stuff.

"Dad was really mad and it was kinda scary, even though he wasn’t yelling at us."

"You could see them through your door?" I interrupted.

"Well, it was kinda still open a little bit."

"Okay, so your dad was yelling at Tim?"

"Yeah," he said, suddenly excited again, but nervous as well. "Then Dad called me and Ty, so we went back out there, and he asked what we knew, but we didn’t really know nuthin’, but we told him that Mom had told the little guys to help with the laundry. Then he asked if Mom had said that Tim could spank ‘em, but we didn’t hear her if she did, and Tim said she didn’t, but he thought, then Dad interrupted him and said he didn’t think at all. Dad asked us all if Tim had ever spanked anyone before, but he hadn’t.

"Anyway, then Dad started chewing him out about who was in charge and getting too big for his britches, and then Dad told Tim to take off ALL his clothes. Right there. Tim started crying, but when Dad tells you to do something, you better do it. ‘Specially when he’s mad, so he started taking his clothes off, even though me and Ty and the little guys were all standing there. Anyway, the little guys still had their pants and undies down.

Riley stopped for a second and looked at me, seeming a little shy, before he went on. "You know Tim’s nearly thirteen?"

"Yeah, in April, right?"

"No, May. Anyway, he’s starting to grow up, and his… thing is getting bigger, so it looked really funny with him standing there naked. He didn’t want to take his boxers off with us all standing there, but Dad said he was making things worse, so he took them off. Dad already had his belt off, so Tim was already pretty worried."

He paused and looked at me, and I suddenly realized that his chin was quivering and his eyes were a little damp.

"I know that Tim shouldn’t-a spanked Scooter and Donny, but I felt really bad for Tim. I really don’t like the belt, Jack."

"That’s right. You’ve had a taste of it now, haven’t you?"

He nodded. "Just a taste or have you gotten a whole whipping with it yet?"

"Just that once," he nearly whimpered, so I got up and stepped over to him. I bent down, grabbing him under the arms and lifting him into a hug, swinging his legs around a bit and holding under his rear, so I could sit down with him in my lap.

"Did you know my dad whipped me with the belt when I was a kid?"

I could feel him shake his head against my chest.

"I know it hurts, Riley. Which do you think is worse, the belt or the switch?"

"The switch!" he answered quickly and without doubt. "I’m never gonna play with fire again."

"Good idea, Buddy, and that’s why I switched you, but just remember the same thing for the belt. Your dad doesn’t spank you because he’s mad at you but because he wants you to do good and stay out of trouble. You know how bad the belt hurts, and it’s probably scary because you’ve not had a whole whipping yet, but you lived through the switch, and Tim and I’ve lived through the belt, so you know you’re gonna be okay. Okay?"

I felt him nod slowly, and just held him for a minute until he felt like talking again.

"Thanks, Uncle Jack," he finally said quietly.

I replied with a kiss on his forehead, then leaned back a bit and he leaned the other way to look up at me.

"So, Tim looks pretty funny with his clothes off, huh? Does he have any hair yet?"

Normally I’d never ask a boy a question like that, but he’d brought it up, so I felt a little safer.

"Nope, but his thing’s bigger than Johnny’s and Josh’s. It’s almost as big as Doug’s."

I nodded appreciatively, since he was impressed, and was thinking about how to get him back on topic, when he went on without me.

"Anyway, we have this couch outside our rooms and Dad made Tim lay down over the arm of it, and he started whipping him with the belt. Tim screamed every time that belt hit, and it left these big, red stripes on his bu… bottom. It was really scary, Jack. I mean, Ty and them don’t know how bad it hurts, and Tim was crying really hard."

"Do you think he deserved it, Riley?"

"I dunno. I guess."

"I don’t know exactly what your dad said, but if Tim spanked the little guys this time, when they deserved it, what about next time? I think your dad was afraid of him spanking someone when they didn’t deserve it, and also that maybe he’d spanked someone before, but they were afraid to admit it."

"I guess…." he replied, half doubtfully, but half thoughtfully, like he wanted to believe that’s what it was.

"So," I prodded, wanting to return to the main story, "how many smacks did Tim get?"

"I couldn’t count ‘em. I was feeling kinda sick, but Ty did and he said twelve. He was crying really hard, Jack."

I pulled the boy tight to my chest for a minute, then sat him on his feet. "I’m really sorry about that, Riley, and I’m really sorry you were scared. Maybe you should talk to Tim tonight and tell him how you felt when you had to watch." I paused for a moment, weighing my next words. "If you do talk to him, you can tell him that I got a whipping when I was older than him for almost the same thing."

"You did! Older than twelve!!"

"Yes, believe it or not. Tell Tim maybe I’ll tell him the story one day, if he’s interested."

"And me?" he asked a bit shyly.

"Maybe," I replied, smiling.

"So what happened after that?"

He shrugged. "Dad told Tim he could get up and go to his room when he finished crying. The little guys had to go put away the rest of the laundry since Tim had already folded it. He asked me and Ty what we were supposed to be doing, but we told him we’d already finished, so he let us go back to our room."

The boy stopped and looked at me, and again seemed to be stricken with shy. "I went to my room with Ty, but Dad and the little guys went downstairs, and Tim was still lying there, crying." He paused again, a bit longer. "Promise not to tell anybody."

"Cross my heart," I assured him.

"I went back and rubbed his bottom for him a little, then helped him to his room."

"I don’t think that’s anything to be embarrassed about, Riley. It’s very nice you care about your big brother."

He blushed at the compliment, but smiled as well.

"And now," I said, taking him by the shoulders and turning him, "why don’t you let me get back to my computer, and you," I placed a light swat on his bottom, drawing a yelp and making him jump forward just a bit, "go back out and play before that rain gets here tomorrow."



Post Scriptum

Yesterday was drizzly most of the afternoon and we had a few, hard showers. Most of the kids friends stayed home, but I did have a visitior just before dinner last night; the star himself, Tim Malone.

We were having stew for dinner, and I’d just popped some corn bread into the oven when he showed, so I was able to sit down and talk with him a few minutes, which we did in the kitchen.

The first thing Tim did, which kind of impressed me, was to thank me for talking to Riley.

"I don’t really remember the first time I got the belt. I was about Riley’s age, fifth grade, I guess, but I don’t remember why. I don’t really even remember what I did. Mom had sent me to my room, and Dad came up in a couple of minutes, and I guess I was just expecting a spanking like he always gave, but when I had my clothes down, he took off his belt. I guess it’s pretty scary for Riley, since he’s not really had a whipping with it yet."

I think Tim was definitely right about that, and I made a note to myself to talk to Curtis about it, when it comes Tyler’s turn next year. Of course, with two big brothers getting the belt, one of them his roommate, maybe Tyler won’t have the same adjustment problems Riley’s having. And, to quote a friend of mine, Riley’s ‘a good boy’, so he’s probably less used to getting spanked all the way around.

"I knew he was upset when I got whipped, but I didn’t really know why, but he said you told him to talk to me last night. I tried to tell him the belt’s not really that bad…"

He must have seen my eyebrow go up in a Spockian look of disbelief, because he suddenly interrupted himself.

"I mean, it hurts really bad, but Dad only gives me twelve most of the time, and Riley won’t even get that. When Mom spanks with that brush, she gives bunches - like thirty or something, so even if the belt’s twice as bad as the brush…"

"The belt’s still better in the long run," I finished for him.

"Yeah," he looked up at me, smiling that I understood him.

"I ain’t sure he believed me, but I think he felt some better, anyway."

"That’s good, Tim, but how about you?"

"What d’ya mean?"

"How do you feel about what happened Monday?"

"Embarrassed," he said, blushingly nicely to make his point.

"I think part of the reason Riley was so upset was because y’all’s dad was so mad."

Now Tim looked confused for a second. "He wasn’t all that mad."

"He wasn’t?" I asked, but as soon as I asked, I realized a couple of things. First, Riley didn’t hear the whole lecture, so he doesn’t know what was said at first by Dad, or what smart aleck replies Tim might have made. The second thing was, when Riley said Curtis was yelling, I took that as mad, but then again, Curtis always talks at what seems a loud volume to me. Maybe I’d just misread what Riley had said, or maybe he’d misread the situation some.

"I mean, he was mad. I knew I really shouldn’t of spanked the guys, I guess. Krista gets to spank Brandon and Morgan, but she don’t even get to spank Scooter anymore."

Brandon and Morgan were the toddlers, and Krista actually only gave them swats, not spankings, but I took his point.

"So, what are you going to do next time you’re left alone there with the boys and they act up?"

"Either wait for Mom or Dad to get home, or tell ‘em I’m gonna send ‘em over here to see you. That’ll make ‘em straighten up quick!"

Smart aleck!



Tim stayed and had dinner with us, and, afterwards, he and I retreated to my office, where we sat on the couch and I shared the story of when the same basic thing had happened to me, with almost the same results. The only differences were I was older, and I’d been doing it for years before I got caught. I didn’t think it’s be a good idea to share that last bit of data with him, though.





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