Practical Jokers

"Yes, Kim, I agree that they disobeyed and deserved a spanking. No, I still think giving them a second chance was the right thing to do. I will definitely have a long talk with them as soon as they get here, and I’ll treat Riley just like I do Johnny."

I don’t want to say that Kim was haranguing me, but I did feel like I was suffering some guilt by association since I’d talked her out of spanking the two boys the first time they’d pulled this stunt. I’m sure I’d not made her any happier when I’d seemed to defend them this time.

"Kim? They’re in the front yard now, so I’d better go. You, too. Have a good day."

Immediately after I’d hung up, I went to the front door and pulled it open as soon as I felt a hand on the knob. The two boys jumped in surprise to find me awaiting them. Their looks quickly changed to sheepish.

"I guess Mom called you…." Riley supplied, more to fill the silence as I escorted them in.

"Yes, she did."

"Are you going to spank us again?"

"Didn’t Johnny tell you how I usually handle this kind of thing, Riley?"

"Yes, sir. Mom spanked really good. You don’t have to do it again."

"That’s not really up to you to decide, but I try hard to be fair."

This short discussion had been filled with "er’s" and pauses, and lasted while the two boys removed their shoes and I escorted the two of them to my office. Once there, I went to the spanking chair, and Johnny came to stand in front of me without being told. Riley followed him with only slight hesitation.

"Your mom sent you over here so I could follow up on your misbehavior. If Johnny told you what happens when he gets spanked at someone else’s house, then you know the first thing I’m going to do is check your bottoms to make sure you were spanked hard enough."

"We were; Aunt Kim spanks really hard, Dad."

"I’m sure she does, and I’m sure you were, but we’re still going to check. Lift your shirts."

The two boys were obviously worried about another session, but Johnny knew that I rarely spanked again in these situations; however, disobeying would guarantee one. When his shirt was lifted up above his chest, Riley quickly followed suit.

Riley is a basic, active, 10-year old boy. He’s pretty mature in a lot of ways, which is probably why he enjoys hanging out with the twins more than Bryce. He’s about average size, maybe 4’7" and a little over 70 pounds. He’s not as firm as his little brother, Tyler. It looks like he has just a little extra padding. Since I know he’s just as active as the other boy, that probably means he’s getting ready for a growth spurt.

I knew Riley was adopted, which is why he looks so different from his brothers. He’s actually the other boys’ cousin. What’s really funny is that his biological brother, Michael Tate, looks more like the Malone boys than Riley does. Unlike their thin, light brown/blond hair and blue eyes, Riley’s hair is a thick, dark brown that’s nearly black, and his eyes are a pale, grayish-green. His facial features don’t look totally unlike his adopted brothers. He’s a little narrower in the face than they tend to be, his ears are a little smaller than most of theirs, and his nose a little bigger; but, he’s not totally outside their average. It really looks like he got his coloring from dad, but he got most of his features from Kim’s sister, his biological mother. Wherever he came from, he was still a really cute kid. And normally a well-behaved one, which is why I’d never spanked him and why I was a bit confused over this recent spurt of misbehavior.

It had only taken me a moment to get Johnny’s jean shorts unfastened and have him step out of them. It took less than that to slide Riley’s black and white- striped board shorts down his legs and off. Johnny had switched to boxers at the start of this school year, but then he’d decided to change back to briefs, so there was never any telling what he was going to be wearing. On the other hand, while the Malone boys always had pretty nice clothes; with five school age boys, Kim didn’t believe in wasting money on boxers. Therefore, I wasn’t very surprised to have both boys standing in front of me in tighty whities. The only real surprise was that Riley seemed to be happy about something. The briefs came down and off just as easily as the pants did; then I had both boys raise their arms so I could take their shirts off as well. Johnny was used to it and knew what to expect, but as Riley’s peach polo came over his head, he seemed a little distraught to be losing his last, meager protection.

As soon as his shirt was off, Riley dropped his hands to cover his stiff, two inch boyhood. I had no idea if it was embarrassment, fear, or just anticipation, but something definitely had him excited. I don’t normally allow covering, since I believe that embarrassment is part of a a punishment, but decided that we could let it pass this time. However, I think his action and my ignoring it might have drawn Johnny’s attention and curiosity.

"Like I said before, I usually start these things by checking to make sure you’ve been spanked well enough," I told mostly Riley, as I leaned back in my chair. "This time, though, I sure would like to know what the heck you boys thought you were doing playing another practical joke after that talk we had a couple of weeks ago."

The two boys looked at each other. Johnny blushed, but Riley stepped up to bat. "But we didn’t, Uncle Jack." The boy forgot his modesty and his hands came up in supplication. Johnny was watching his younger friend make the plea for mercy, but when Riley’s hands came up, Johnny’s eyes went down and wide. "We made real sure that no one could get hurt. Not like last time."

"I’m glad you did that much, but didn’t we talk about how practical jokes are a real bad idea, and how they weren’t funny to the person they happened to, and how you should NOT do them anymore?"

Both boys went red at the end. I think they were both worried about their bottoms again, considering how their hands stole behind them. They had a right to worry honestly, since I was pretty upset with them.

Less than two weeks before, Kim had called me up. Johnny and Riley had made a bucket of ‘slime’ in Riley’s mad scientist kit and were trying to rig the bucket to fall on someone’s head when they walked through the door to Tim’s bedroom. Since Riley’s oldest brother had a bedroom mostly to himself (except when their cousin Mike was visiting), it seemed fairly obvious at whom it was aimed. Except Kim had caught them at it. She wanted to know if she should send Johnny home before she spanked Riley.

I remember what it’s like to be a boy. I remember when I thought the Three Stooges were the height of comedy. And I have no doubt that it’s always fun to prank your big brother. After all, if you did something to your little brother, you were being a bully. I had little doubt that younger brothers always had some grievance saved up to get back at their big brother for. The fact that they were doing this wasn’t expected, but was hardly a surprise, either.

Instead of sending Johnny home before she spanked Riley, I convinced her to send both boys home and let me talk to them. The three of us had a long talk about how the people who do physical comedy in movies and on TV are trained stunt people who’ve practiced that one scene; how some practical jokes (like the bucket over the door) can be dangerous if not done exactly right; how bad it can make you feel to have a joke pulled on you; the difference between telling a joke, teasing a little, and pulling a practical joke; and why it was just not a good idea so we weren’t going to do it anymore.

And now, here they were, back again. Kim was upset with me for not letting her spank the boys in the first place. That probably would have stopped them from doing it this time; but I think the real reason for her upset was that she’d walked into it. The boys had put some Vaseline in the freezer for a little bit, then put it on the door to Tim’s bedroom and hidden nearby to watch. Unfortunately, Kim was going into Tim’s room to put away some clean clothes. When she’d touched the cold, greasy mess, she’d jumped, dumping the basket of clothes. When she turned around, the first thing she spotted was the two practical jokers (who were probably looking somewhere between stunned and scared, while also trying not to laugh— at least, that’s how I would have looked).

The Malone’s house is laid out roughly like most of the houses in Arbor Grove, and they were upstairs in the family room when this happened. That was a shame, because that’s where the two boys were spanked. Kim told them to stand right there and went into the bathroom, coming out a minute later wiping the Vaseline off her hand with a washcloth, which was in the same hand as the hairbrush—which was of much more concern to the two boys.

She started with Riley, which was probably fair. Even though Johnny was company, he’s older and bigger than Riley. Johnny didn’t get to watch Riley’s paddling though, since Kim had him busy refolding the laundry. Not getting to watch didn’t calm Johnny down, though; since Riley apparently made plenty of noise (and Riley blushed as Johnny shared that), and he could imagine the whole scene.

As soon as Riley was done, Johnny had to go over to her, and he found himself bare bottomed and face down before Riley had finished his fire dance. The worst part was that Riley had made enough noise to attract attention, and all his younger brothers, Scott, Donny, and Tyler, had come out to see what was going on and caught the end of his spanking and all of Johnny’s. Johnny had added enough noise to catch Tim’s attention and bring him upstairs. Both boys agreed that the ONLY saving grace was that Krista had apparently been changing the baby’s diaper and hadn’t been able to investigate. Johnny was pretty sure he would have died right there if that had happened. Then, to add insult to injury, the two boys had been made to finish picking up the laundry and clean the door knob before being allowed to pull their clothes up. I know the Malone family has the same rules on after-spanking teasing that I do, but it sounds like the other boys did get a great view of two fresh-spanked bottoms.

Lest I give the wrong impression, I don’t think Kim was wrong to spank the boys. I probably would have clarified matters and given them one more chance, but I’m not the one who got a handful of cold grease, which might have made a difference.

Have you ever noticed that stiffies seem to be contagious—especially in little boys? While he was telling me what had happened, Riley seemed to distract himself and his started to fade, but Johnny had already noticed and was becoming a little excited himself. When Johnny interrupted to clarify a point, Riley glanced over at him, and the cycle began again.

As it became clear that they were going to share the story in great detail - as much as I could wish, right down to Riley describing his mom’s big, plastic hairbrush, I let them keep talking, but took Riley over my lap.

Even if it had been all white, I would have had to admit that Riley had a sweet little bottom. He didn’t have much in the way of hips, but his bottom was nicely rounded out to the back, with pronounced upper and lower slopes and had very slight dimples. It wasn’t all white though. As a matter of fact, those lower slopes—his little sit spots— were a still a very dark red. Considering it had probably been 20 minutes since his spanking, they must have been crimson when he got up. The surrounding areas quickly tapered off to red, even pink, and the upper slopes, legs, and dimples were white. Especially considering the implement used, it must have been a fairly brief, but incredibly intense spanking— especially for Johnny, who was used to my more drawn out, slow building affairs.

"Johnny," I interrupted him, as soon as he came to a slow spot in his description of how embarrassing it had been to have to pull his shorts down for ‘Aunt Kim’. "I know you and Josh have checked each other’s bottoms after I’ve spanked you; right?"

He glanced at his buddy, looking a bit embarrassed, but admitted it.

I‘m sure Riley chirping up from over my lap with, "I do that with Tyler all the time," helped take some of the sting out of it.

"Good. Johnny, you know what my spankings look like. Does this look like one of mine?" I asked, as I ran my hand around the sides of the bottom that hadn’t been touched at all. I felt Riley tremble a bit at the feeling of my fingertips tracing around his bottom.

"No, sir," Johnny admitted. "Yours would be red everywhere."

"Then if yours looks like this, I really should touch you boys up. Come squeeze in next to Riley and let’s take a look."

I’d felt Riley tense up when I said that, and Johnny was none to happy to be helping, but he knew better than to make things difficult, so he stretched himself across the end of my legs, keeping feet and a hand on the ground to hold himself in place. It wasn’t hard to see that his bottom was almost a mirror image of Riley’s. While Riley is an average sized 10-year-old, Johnny is a little big for an 11-year-old. Though his bottom was bigger than Riley’s, and Johnny even had a little more in the hips department, it was still just as nice as his friend’s smaller rear.

After a minute’s rubbing, I had the two of them hop up. Between my silence and the rubbing, they were both a little more relaxed, and I watched them surreptitiously checking out each other’s little boners while I leaned back to collect my thoughts. Both boys jumped when I began to speak again. "Here’s the deal guys. I know that I very specifically told you ‘no more practical jokes’. You deserved the spanking you got, and I’m very tempted to warm you both up for disobeying me. HOWEVER, what we really talked about was that some practical jokes can be dangerous. I’ve decided that I’m going to give you the benefit of the doubt, and believe that you just misunderstood me, and that you didn’t mean to disobey me. So that means no more spankings today. Is that okay with you two?"

They both rushed to assure me it was— Riley stuttering out a thank you, while Johnny managed to trip over his tongue a couple of times (since I doubt he really meant ‘we need another spanking‘).

"However, there’s still something you have to do; isn’t there, Johnny?"

"You mean write a letter?"

"Yes, sir. That’s exactly what I mean." Then I turned my attention to Riley and explained our traditional method of finishing up punishments that occur at other people’s homes.

"Riley, since Johnny needs to write a letter to your mom, I think you should write a letter to Tim and apologize to him, since he’s the one you keep trying to play jokes on."

"Do I have to?"

"No, I can go ahead and spank you instead."

The dark-haired boy looked at me for a minute before showing how smart he actually is. "Can I borrow some paper?"

"I think we can arrange that."

I stood and put the hard, wooden, spanking chair in front of my computer, then had Johnny sit on it. It was fun watching him ease into the chair, then squirm as he tried to find a way to keep his weight off his well-blazed sit spots. As he began drafting a letter, I excused myself long enough to fetch a second, almost identical spanking chair from another room, putting it in front of my regular desk. Then I dug out a pencil and a legal pad.

While Riley tried to find a way to sit that was comfortable, I told him "You can write a letter up here, then type it up when Johnny’s finished. You can type, can’t you?" I added in an afterthought. He admitted he could, so I left the two of them to it.

Riley finished up first, and I stuck him in the corner while I read over it and did some minor editing. When Johnny finished his letter, we did a couple of corrections, then I let him take a turn in the corner while Riley made a brief addendum to the letter to his mom. Then he typed his letter to Tim and I double checked it before sending him back to the corner, so Johnny could add his apology to Tim to Riley’s note. With both letters printed out, I called both boys to stand in front of me one more time.

I’d been seriously thinking of making a major threat to both boys about the next time they played practical jokes. The only problem was, if I did that, I’d almost certainly have to carry it out. I understand Kim’s feelings and felt that Johnny had as well, and needed to follow her rules if he went over there. However, I also know boys, and I was morally certain that this wasn’t the last time these two were going to get up to this type of mischief.

I made them apologize to each other for encouraging each other into trouble, and they shared a hug, which I joined, and both of them turned to hug me; and I told them, "Guys, I love you both. If you pull this kind of stunt, Kim’s just going to wear your little bottoms out again; so, why don’t you think before you pull a practical joke. Remember what we talked about and try to decide if it will be funnier for you to see Tim or somebody grab a handful of cold Vaseline or for them to watch you guys getting your fannies tanned. Okay?"

Still squeezing my neck, they both promised they’d think hard about it, and Riley blushingly admitted that he loved me, too. Then I let them go and helped them get dressed. Proving that I’m still boyish and understand their sense of humor, I handed each of them a pair of briefs and watched Johnny try to pull his into place, while Riley tried to figure out why his wouldn’t stay up. They boy laughed when they figured it out, but Johnny had the nerve to claim that I needed a spanking.